Woohoo! A Continuation of Exclamation Points!!
As noted in Part 1, exclamation points can affect the tone. The punctuation mark gives a heightened sense of emotion, and this can be positive (as in Happy Birthday!!!) or it can read in a more negative way (as in some business communications).
“Thank you” is another common phrase in which use (or non-use) of an exclamation point can affect tone. I often sign off emails with “Thank you.” It’s my closing. I follow it with a comma and sign my name. However, if I’m especially appreciative of what someone has done, I will sign with “Thanks!” or “Thank you!” (sometimes with two exclamation points, depending on the context and receiver of the message). As a closing message, the exclamation point with “Thanks” is generally pretty arbitrary and its use won’t make much of a difference. However, I can think of instances where lack of an exclamation point with “Thanks” could cause problems. This is more likely to occur in a social interaction than a professional one. Picture this scenario: You’ve helped out a friend by picking up some dinner or groceries for them. Maybe you also went above and beyond and bought the friend a surprise gift, maybe a pie or a plant. The friend texts you, “Thanks,” without any exclamation point(s)–without any end-punctuation at all perhaps. It might not be anything overt (it’s a word of thanks, after all), but if the receiver of the message feels slighted by that missing exclamation point, they might think, “Well, heck, that’s the last time I do something nice for them.”
Communication Requires Understanding the Nature of People!
The above scenario might seem petty, but if you study any kind of interaction between people, you’ll see exactly how such so-called pettiness affects every single relationship. Here’s the thing: It’s not petty if it’s important to someone, even if that importance seems unfounded to you.
Writing is communication, and to effectively communicate, you have to have a basic understanding of people. There are people who are oblivious as to how their messages are coming across to others, even after they’ve delivered their message and seen the response. It’s true that most of us are oblivious occasionally in certain situations. After all, we can’t be aware all the time. A lot of us say things and immediately wish we hadn’t said those things. It’s called being human. None of us are perfect communicators. Some of us replay conversations in our heads at night, wishing we had said things differently. One of the things I love about writing, in fact, is that I can plan my words more carefully. I can think about how my audience will interpret them. I can rephrase and edit before I allow my words to be seen by others. (And then I’ll edit some more. . .)
With written communication, you have the “disadvantage” (depending on how you look at it) of not being able to see your audience’s response to your words; that is why it is so essential that you consider your audience and the ways they might interpret your sentiment.
Perception Is Everything!
Generally, when someone wishes me a happy birthday, regardless of whether they’ve used an exclamation point, I interpret it as a genuine wish. Similarly, I give the benefit of the doubt to people who write “Thanks” without an exclamation point. There are people I know who never (or very rarely) use exclamation points, so it’s no surprise to me if they send me a message that says, “Happy Birthday” or “Thanks.” No exclamation points. However, if I happened to be having a prolonged argument with someone—or if we had what I perceived was a negative interaction recently—I might look at the lack of an exclamation point differently and conclude that they didn’t really mean their “Happy Birthday” or “Thanks.” It is most often these differences in perception that cause rifts between people (as with Elaine and Jake on Seinfeld—refer to The Art of the Exclamation Point! Part 1!).
To summarize, exclamation points show an increase in the level of emotion. With “Happy Birthday,” this increase is generally looked upon favorably. But from a professional standpoint, particularly in organizational communication, the use of exclamation points can create an angry or aggressive tone, creating rifts between colleagues in an organization. Because an exclamation point changes tone, its use is heavily dependent on the purpose of your writing and your intended audience. Therefore, I’ve created some guidelines for using exclamation points effectively.
Academic/Scholarly Writing!
In academic/scholarly writing, you should probably never use exclamation points. There may be a few exceptions here and there, but I can’t think of any example where it would be appropriate, unless you’re citing a book/article whose title contains an exclamation point or if you’re writing an academic essay about exclamation points—which actually sounds kind of fun . . .
Informal Writing!
In informal writing (e.g., blog posts, social media), exclamation points can be used, maybe even liberally. Remember, though, that they are showing a heightened level of emotion, and that emotion can be positive or negative, so use them accordingly. Analyze what emotions the words you’re using are conveying. Is the heightened level of excitation warranted? But don’t worry about it too much. In most cases, it won’t matter, especially on social media.
Creative Writing!
In creative writing—fiction, nonfiction, personal essays—exclamation points should be used with caution. If you’re not sure if they’re warranted, you can get feedback from readers (e.g., in a writing group) or from a writing consultant or editor.
Somebody (F. Scott Fitzgerald?) once said that using an exclamation point is like laughing at your own joke—this saying has also been attributed to Mark Twain. In other words, you might come across as desperate or like you’re trying too hard. Instead, let your words and phrases stand on their own; give your reader some credit. That said, exclamation points do have their place, especially in informal writing. It’s also appropriate to use exclamation points in dialogue, but they shouldn’t be overused. Precise and careful word choice often can relay the same heightened sense of emotion as an exclamation point. I’d also recommend not using more than one exclamation point at a time. As with most things, though, there are exceptions. For example, if someone is writing a story in a way that mimics text message form or emails, use of exclamation points would make sense.
Another writer (I’m not sure who—I’ve seen it attributed to John Steinbeck but cannot verify) stated that the rule of thumb is one exclamation point per every 20,000 words. While it may be rational advice, especially for people prone to overusing exclamation points, it’s an arbitrary guideline. For fun, I did a search (with MS Word’s “Find” function) through my in-process collection of short stories. According to the 20,000-word rule, I should have only two exclamation points–three at most–in the whole collection. I won’t tell you how many are there, but there are considerably more than that! They are used primarily in dialogue. But not always.
Moderation!!!
Ultimately, I can’t tell you how many exclamation points to use in your writing (because, clearly, who am I to judge?), but they should be used with purpose. They should be warranted. Please note: I’ve overused exclamation points in this post for a purpose. Quite a few of them could be omitted without affecting the meaning. This one, for example! And this one!
As with most things in life, moderation is key.
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