Keeping New Year’s Resolutions
According to history.com, it was the ancient Babylonians, 4,000 years ago, who first made New Year’s resolutions and celebrated the new year as such. Nowadays, nearly half of all Americans say they make resolutions.
Of the people who make New Year’s resolutions, though, only a small percentage actually keep to such commitments. Most don’t even keep their resolutions through the end of January. It’s understandable, of course. My dad always says that it takes a month to make a new habit stick. (I don’t know where he got that number; it’s quite possible he made it up.) Other research suggests that it takes more than two months for something to become a firm habit. So, making big changes (e.g., New Year’s resolutions) can be quite difficult for the average person.
What does this mean? As I see it, it means that, first, you shouldn’t make more than one or two resolutions (at a time); and second, you should choose resolutions that are attainable and realistic.
Exercise, Diets, and Writing
I used to work as a bookstore manager. Every January, we created endcap displays of self-help books, diet books, and exercise books–all the books to help people achieve their New Year’s goals. It was a marketing tactic, of course; the purpose was to sell books. But consider the following (fabricated but not necessarily uncommon) resolutions:
- I’m going to run a marathon this year.
- I’m going to lose fifteen pounds by summer.
- I’m going to write a novel this year.
Set Attainable and Realistic Goals
Depending on your current lifestyle and hobbies, such resolutions as noted above may or may not be realistic or attainable. I’m a runner and have run three half-marathons within the last five years. A marathon, though, would be a lofty goal and not one that I could easily commit to. Although I like the idea of running a marathon (and would love to say that I’ve done it), I’m not prepared for the lifestyle changes that training for such a feat would require (e.g., getting up early to run before work several times a week). As such, it’s not a realistic resolution for me, even though it may be physically realistic (though that might be questionable, too!).
Consider the Commitment
Like training for a marathon, changing one’s diet also requires a certain level of commitment. I have found that small, gradual changes in diet are easiest to commit to and maintain (as opposed to the drastic, sudden changes that many weight loss diets require). In my opinion, one should be more concerned with overall health than reaching a certain number on the scale. To that end, perhaps it might be better to slowly cut down on certain foods. For example, in trying to cut down on sugar in my diet, a few years ago I started ordering my mocha lattes with half the chocolate. I now order plain lattes (no flavoring and no sweetener), something my self of two years ago would have strongly resisted. Such a gradual change, though, is much easier to maintain. I’ve since stopped adding sweetener to my tea, too–without even thinking about it!
Where Does Writing Fit?
The act of writing is not much different than the act of exercising or the act of changing one’s diet. If you’ve never written long fiction, resolving to write a novel in a year may not be a realistic goal. If you’ve written a first draft of a novel and are hoping to publish it in the new year, that may also be unrealistic (though there are many factors to consider). The revision and submission processes can be both daunting and demanding. Set your sights high, but be realistic. A large writing project requires a large commitment.
Pick Just One New Year’s Resolution
You’ve probably heard the old saying, “Don’t bite off more than you can chew.” When it comes to choosing a resolution, this is especially true. Don’t try to run a marathon AND write a novel. (The truth is that running a marathon might be easier!) Making too many changes at once may be setting yourself up for failure. Remember that it takes quite a while to make something a habit, whether it’s running regularly, eating something different, or writing on a regular basis. So, start with just one resolution, and allow yourself to succeed.
What’s Your Passion?
If you’re like me and have a head full of goals, it can be hard to pick just one resolution. So, ask yourself what your passion is and/or what your priority is. My passion is writing, and I enjoy everything related to writing, including editing and revision. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy.
One of my goals for the new year is to rework my MFA thesis (a collection of short stories). This “reworking” involves heavy revision as well as the writing of new stories to replace some that I’m no longer excited about. The ultimate goal is to have a manuscript that I can submit to contests or agents. It’s one resolution, but it’s also many small goals. Is it attainable? Only time will tell. But I can tell you this: It takes discipline, and it requires me to form and maintain new writing habits. Otherwise, it’s much too easy to push the project aside and procrastinate.
If it takes two months to make a habit (in this case, a writing habit) stick, we’ll know soon enough whether my resolution is realistic. And if I need to “reset” myself (as I often do!), that’s okay, too. Life happens, and sometimes it interferes with our goals and resolutions. If that happens, pick up where you left off and try again, even if it means changing your resolution to make it more realistic and attainable.
Give Yourself a Break
Back 4,000 years ago, I bet that even most of the ancient Babylonians broke their New Year’s resolutions. My guess would be that even as the world has changed, human nature is still much the same. We bite off more than we can chew; we try to do too much. I absolutely applaud ambition, and I absolutely applaud those who successfully take on lofty goals. But we all vary in our skill levels and energy levels. So, give yourself a break. You’re human; you don’t have to be “perfect.”
And in case you need a reminder as to the problem with striving to be “perfect,” check out this previous post, “On Being a Perfectionist.”
I’d love to hear what (if any) resolutions you have for the new year–post them in the comments or contact me! Happy New Year!
2 Comments
Pat Bieber · January 2, 2020 at 11:38 am
My resolutions? Write something — anything — every day. I started with a non-traditional haiku at 1:20 AM on the first. Wrote three or four variations on it later in the day. Today (the 2nd) so far I have written up the minutes for the December Writers on the Avenue meeting/holiday party. Hoping to write something more exciting later. I will be checking nahaiwrimo on FB for daily prompts — today’s is first names. Doesn’t really trigger anything yet but maybe later.Also started a notebook — nothing formal, just one small enough to fit in my purse — to keep track of word counts & revising time. Looking forward to hearing from you throughout 2020! Happy New Year — hope it’s a great one for you!
Jessica Klimesh · January 2, 2020 at 12:36 pm
A great resolution, Pat! I like having a small notebook/journal that slips easily in my purse, but I honestly don’t use it very often (though I wish I did!). I need to get back to writing longhand instead of always typing on the computer. Happy New Year!